Years of reading Dolly and Cleo in my influential teen years has taught me loads of useless relationship things. One of the most shallow things I learnt was that you always judge a man by his shoes. Not in size for appendage reasons, but actually look at the shoe to weigh up their personality. Now both you and I know this is a ball of rot, but it doesn’t stop me from noticing things when they are wrong.
There is this guy that gets off at the same stop as me in the morning and he wears the most beautiful office clothes with a really nice shoulder bag, an excellent haircut and white bloody exercise sneakers! Not cool white adidas ones, more like the kind you get at coles on a saturday morning to wear while you paint the fence.
I’ve been meaning to blog about this for a while, because the shoes ruin his whole look and it frustrates me every morning but I’ve never gotten around to it. So today, I decide I will write about it and zoom in for a closer look as we get off the train to describe them better. But the guy ruins it for me! He has bought new shoes! They are dark and more office attire like, but they are horrible. They are those sketchers type shoes that are made of suede. I’m dissapointed in his choice but I’m also dissapointed in the fact that I care so much about his shoes. But what else is there to think about while walking out of a train station?
So, using the Dolly/Cleo rating method of judging the guy based on his shoes, I’d say that this is a man who has risen above his roots and is working on himself from the top down. I suspect he was single until recently when he got a girlfriend from “back home” who picked his new ugly shoes for him. Or his mum sent them to him for his birthday not knowing about his new Micheal J. Fox “Secret of my success” city look. (As an aside, Helen Slater was hot as Supergirl). The worst possibility is that he picked both pairs of shoes himself in which case I don’t understand why the rest of his clothes are so nice.
I haven’t read Cleo or Dolly for years, but I’m sure they now say “you can tell how idiotic a girl is by the shallow blog entries they write”. I reckon I rate 10 out of 10. Yeah Baby!